Thursday, August 19, 2004

Busy Brain

It is 5:28am. I am awake and have been for about an hour. Right now, I am blogging from my computer, which is no longer a desktop... more a floortop. It's set up in the corner, and the monitor is sitting on the printer box.

I have busy brain, as is probably normal for people about to move, but I need sleep, and it just isn't happening. I have another two and a half hours I can sleep. I hope I'm able to catch some more z's before then. About a dozen people are coming to help load the truck. In what order will I load the truck? How should I organize all these people? And perhaps most importantly, how many bagels should I buy and what flavors? Do people really want blueberry and chocolate chip bagels? Isn't that an afront to all bagelkind?

So many things to deal with... and even though I know it will all get done, it's very hard to detach. I already feel a bit controlling and noone is even here yet! Normally when I feel controlling about things, I leave, like when people are cooking. I have so many opinions about it that I am best to just stay in the other room and busy myself. Some people welcome my kitchen tips, and some people feel that me giving advice means I think they are doing it wrong. Anyway, the hard part of it is that I sort of DO have to supervise and direct. I can't just disengage. I will be so glad when it's all in the truck. So very glad indeed.

I sure hope the girls are OK. I am so concerned about their well-being right now. Jeep is on anti-depressants again. Gave her the first one last night. She's had some real trouble adjusting to change in the past, and knowing this, I didn't want to throw her into another situation in which I know she'd feel terrified. I hate medicating her like this, but it's either that or knowingly put her in a situation that I know she isn't equipped to handle on her own. Man, I love my girls. I hope they aren't too traumatized by all of this. They've never moved before.