Saturday, November 06, 2004

Colbert on Why Bush Won

Steven Colbert did this hilarious analysis of why Bush won on Wednesday's Daily Show. I looked all over the Internet for a transcript and couldn't find one, so I watched this clip and transcribed the part at the end that I think is so very funny. Here's what I think was the best part:
Stewart: What do you think won this thing for Bush? What did it for him?

Colbert: Two issues, Jon. Exit polls of Bush voters said that the issues most important to them were terrorism and Cultural Values, both of which fall under the umbrella of fear.

Stewart: So, how are both of those issues fear?

Colbert: [Lots of silliness you can watch on the video]

Stewart: If those are the two major issues concerning voters, and again, why would NYC, which really has the most significant gay population in the country and has already has had the most significant terror attack in the country vote overwhelmingly for Kerry?

Colbert: Well, here’s the thing, Jon. We in New York are too close to the terrorism and the gay people. Only the red states, with the advantage of a safe distance, can take in the whole picture and clearly see what we should do about those issues. And so, on behalf of everyone living in the blue states, I’d like to thank the red states for saving us from ourselves.