Sunday, February 06, 2005

The Main Thing

My to do list is not pleasing me. Currently, here is what is left for the evening:
  • Clean cat litter
  • Put away Christmas ornaments
  • Handwash bras
  • Clean bathroom
  • E-mail January log to internship director
  • Complete Human Subjects extension form
  • Vacuum
  • Consult times clients are free this week and write into schedule
See, the problem is that the main thing I want to be doing is brainstorming about my dissertation, because I have some real motivation right now, some really good ideas. Iron Chef America is on in the next room, and I'd really like to be watching that. On Sunday nights, what I really want to do are things that will make my week smoother. My back hurts, and I should be off the computer, but see, the main thing for the last several hours was finishing up all these job letters. I just printed out 9 cover letters and 9 CVs, and I need to put those in enveloped and mail them. See, the main thing is everything. The main thing is stretching so my back doesn't hurt. The main thing is to get off the computer and relax. The main thing is to answer the phone that is ringing... Yeah... and the main thing was finally printing out some business cards to give to clients, since I never can remember my numbers. The main thing was feeling safer after all the hubbub across the street. The main thing is to be smart with money, to lose some of the weight I've gained. The main thing is everything.

I dream of a day when I just have a job. Just one job, without a dissertation, without three very different log formats of how I spend all my time. Without my boyfriend living out of town. Without living across the street from Murder Park. The main thing is getting through the next 6 months alive with my dissertation defended. That's really the main thing. Oh, and having a job. And, and, and...

9:02pm Update: Put the ornaments away. It's February 6th, and I just freakin' put the ornaments away. OK. I'm going to go do the litter now. I really am. I am. I am.

9:20pm Update: Ornaments are put away! Bathroom is clean enough. Not spic and spam, but clean ENOUGH. Enough is enough for me. No handwashing tonight since the water pressure is practically non-existent. The radioators aren't working today either. I wonder what's up.

11:35pm Update: Time for bed. I have a stack of all these applications ready to go out in the morning. Sorry to have totally bored you with this. I'm motivating myself. It's working a little. Thanks for putting up with it. I salute you; Namaste; etc.